It's Not Like I'm Darren Criss
by danrdarrenc
Summary: In the midst of boredom, Kurt and Blaine watch the first act of a little something called "A Very Potter Musical." Single-handedly the most fun one-shot I have ever written.


Kurt was sitting on his favorite couch at Dalton Academy. He had history books spread out on the table in front of him and his laptop open on his lap. But he wasn't doing homework. The causes of the Cold War had bored him to tears, so Kurt had decided to take a break.

Since his boyfriend Blaine was no where in sight, he couldn't spend the break making out with him. Instead, Kurt was surfing Youtube looking for what "Most Popular" videos might interest him. Scrolling down, Kurt stopped when he came across one that said, "A Very Potter Musical Act 1." Having read all seven Harry Potter books and forever looking for new musicals, Kurt furrowed his brow in confusion, not knowing that such a thing existed.

Curious, Kurt clicked on the video and paused it so it could load. When it had loaded enough so that it wouldn't pause midway through, Kurt played the video. Twenty seconds into the video, Kurt again paused the video. But this time it was because of shock – the actor was…Blaine? Or Blaine if he had long, untidy hair and glasses?

Confused and curious, Kurt again played the video. He waited for the actor to start singing and was again shocked and surprised when his voice sounded eerily like Blaine's. Eyes wide and mouth slightly open in bewilderment, Kurt continued watching the video, simultaneously enjoying the musical for it's cleverness and being incredibly befuddled at "Harry's" resemblance to Blaine.

As Kurt was letting the second video of the play load, Blaine appeared in the doorway, holding a bag of Red Vines.

"Hey, whatcha doing?" Blaine said, sitting down on the couch next to Kurt.

"Procrastinating doing my homework and being really confused," Kurt answered, hitting the back button so that Blaine could see the first part of the musical for himself.

"Huh?" Blaine asked, pulling a Red Vine out of the bag and taking a bite.

"I found this on Youtube and it's really confusing me," Kurt said, moving the computer so that Blaine could see the screen better.

"What is it?"

"It's called "A Very Potter Musical," Kurt said.

"There's a musical about Harry Potter?" Blaine asked, his voice full of interest.

Kurt nodded, knowing that Blaine's enjoyment of Harry Potter almost verged on obsession; he had even attempted to write a couple songs about the series.

"Whoa, cool!" Blaine said, as Kurt pressed the play button.

"That's not my confusion, though," Kurt said, smiling.

"Harry" started singing and Blaine said, "This is totally awesome!"

Kurt looked at his boyfriend. "You don't notice anything odd about the guy playing Harry?"

Blaine looked at Kurt, saw he was looking at him curiously, and looked back to the screen.

"No. But he's supermegafoxyawesomehot."

"Blaine!" Kurt said, appalled and amused at the same time. "Don't you think he looks and sounds like you?" Kurt asked, playing the second part of the musical.

"What?" Blaine said, eating another Red Vine.

"Think about it, Blaine. If you let your hair grow out, it would get all curly and messy like his, and if you put on Harry Potter glasses, you would look just like him!"

Blaine looked at Kurt and saw he was serious about "Harry" looking like him. "I guess I kind of look like him," Blaine conceded. "But I think I need to see more of this musical if I'm going to truly _find_ the resemblance."

Kurt smiled and shook his head, clicking on the next part of the StarKidPotter playlist.

They sat watching the next couple parts of the musical, occasionally laughing at the jokes and the way the characters were portrayed, and eating Red Vines.

"I adore the bromance between Voldemort and Quirrell," Blaine said dreamily at one point.

"Well, I'll certainly never be able to read the first book the same way again," Kurt said. Blaine chuckled.

"These jokes truly are brilliant," Kurt said.

"They're genius!" Blaine said, clicking on the next video.

Kurt smiled and rested his head against Blaine's shoulder as they continued to watch the play.

"You still don't think that he looks and sounds like you?" Kurt asked as "Harry" finished singing a song to an Hungarian Horntail.

"No. Nope. I still don't see it," Blaine said. Kurt shook his head in disbelief, clicking the next video.

"I think that drunk Voldemort is the funniest thing I've ever seen," Blaine said. Kurt nodded, trying hard not to laugh.

"Haha! The Draco-Ron-Hermione triangle is great. It should've happened in the books," Kurt said seriously.

Blaine nodded in agreement and clicked on the next video.

"Let's not wear those outfits to prom," Kurt said horror-struck at the unfashionable robes "Harry" and "Ron" were wearing to the Yule Ball.

"Agreed. Wow! This song is amazing!" Blaine said, as Draco and Ron sang about the dangers of falling in love with Hermione Granger. "So much better than anything I could ever write."

"You could have written it if you'd thought of it," Kurt said, ever supportive of his boyfriend.

"Pfft. Yeah, right. No way am I…" Blaine paused, clicking the info button on the video to see who wrote the song. "Darren Criss," Blaine finished.

"No. You're you," Kurt said, giving Blaine a peck on cheek.

Blaine smiled and played the next video.

"_Anastasia_ reference!" Kurt yelled, clapping his hands excitedly when "Harry" and "Ginny" said they should stop dancing even though they already had.

Blaine chuckled at Kurt's amusement, playing the next video.

"Whoa!" Blaine and Kurt both exclaimed, wide-eyed as a half-naked Voldemort popped out of a cauldron and started singing and dancing.

"It's highly disturbing that Voldemort is so attractive," Kurt said.

"It really is," Blaine said, nodding.

"'Oh my Rowling.' This thing is seriously clever. Who ever thought to make this is a genius," Blaine said, as the first act ended.

Kurt smiled and closed Youtube.

"Hey!" Blaine protested. "Aren't we going to watch the rest of it?"

"Later. Right now I really do need to get back to learning the causes of the Cold War," Kurt said, putting his laptop on the table and picking up his history notebook. "Want to help me?"

"If I stay here, you know we won't be studying much," Blaine said, throwing the bag of Red Vines onto the table.

Kurt smiled at the thought of making out with Blaine, but said, "Let's try. This is so boring. Having you here would really make it more interesting."

"As long as we can watch the rest of the musical afterwards," Blaine said.

"As long as we can make out first," Kurt retorted.

"Deal," Blaine said and picked up Kurt's text book.


End file.
